Skip to main content

Positive thoughts

Today is Friday, but I am going to work tomorrow. As a software engineer, I really shouldn't complain about work because of the flexible hours and work from home benefits we get. But, like a spoilt employee, I still don't like the thought of working on a Saturday, poring over logs as they trickle down showing (hopefully) a successful transaction. I will get a day off because of it, but still tomorrow I need to work.

I have a Nuvaring currently have inserted inside me that is supposed to give my ovaries a break from egg production before they are injected with hormones to create enough eggs to fill up a Costco sized egg carton. That Nuvaring, however, caused some side effects and had me spotting in the middle of my cycle. I have never used any kind of hormonal birth control before, and as my periods come like clockwork, I never saw any mid-cycle bleeding either. So, as you can guess, I was not very happy this evening.

On days like this, positivity doesn't come easily.

But then, the ultimate source of positivity lies within us. If we talk about IVF in a negative manner, like think of the unfairness of life, or think of why am I going to the untimely bleeding, poking myself with hormone injections, or doing a bunch of things that goes against Nature and basically mess up our bodies, then we will be depressed and it will affect our health and the entire process. On the other hand, even though it is tough, we can fill ourselves with hope. Sometimes, suddenly, maybe while at work or doing something random, I suddenly feel that in just a few months, I am going to experience something close to a miracle. It shakes me up from within, like a snow globe, and fills me up with glitters. The more we exercise a part of our brain, the stronger it will get, just like building muscles. So, the more positive thoughts we bring, the more positivity will be within and around us.

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

Preparing for the embryo transfer

Now we are approaching the most physically painful part of the process - the progesterone shots. On March 3, I went through a baseline check ultrasound to see how thick the uterine lining was. At this time, as I was on Nuvaring, my lining measured 4 mm which is pretty thin. From March 7, my Delestrogen shots started. They are basically the hormone estrogen that thickens our uterine lining in preparation for a cozy spot for the embryo to snuggle up to. For an embryo transfer, they expect the lining to be around 8-13 mm thick. The way to do that is by the estrogen shots. These intramuscular shots go in the butt and if you were one of those people who was taking the subcutaneous ones by yourself, now you would need someone to give you these ones. These are water soluble injections, so they are not that heavy. Also, I had to give them twice a week.  On March 23, I had another ultrasound to check how my uterine lining has thickened up. In the mean time, I ate normal healthy food...

February - a month of rest

After the egg retrieval surgery happened and my embryos got frozen, February was my month of resting. I went back to my normal life with no restrictions, I started yoga and went back to swimming. My work life also came to a stable ground with me not taking too much sick time off. There was nothing to do related to the IVF process, and my body got time to heal. Here's where I will discuss the frozen embryo transfer process and compare that with the fresh embryo transfer. There are different medical reasons to choose the frozen process, but from a layman's perspective, and also as one undergoing it, I also prefer the frozen process.  1. The body gets time to heal. If I had to do a fresh transfer, that would be 3 days after my egg retrieval. That means my ovaries were sore, still healing from the process, and I was still EXTREMELY bloated. I could barely walk to the bathroom. Going through another process at that time, that is so much taxing on the uterus and my general ...

IVF #2

Frozen Embryo Transfer take 2. After the ERA test results came, we decided to go ahead with round two of an FET with the second (and only) remaining embryo I had. This is a CB embryo (compared to the last one which was BB), so I was a little concerned, but everyone at the clinic told me not to worry about the grading of the embryos.  With my RE Dr. Rehman in the recovery room after the transfer Anyway, so with the second cycle, I decided to go under anesthesia because there was a lot of poking and prodding going on, including two water ultrasound tests I went through. I know the embryo transfer is a very non-invasive process, but I hate the feeling of the speculum inside me. I need to stop being too hard on myself, I thought. On Saturday, September 15, I had the embryo transfer in the afternoon. The day before, I was at work till a little after 5. In a software company, the entire office is almost gone by 4 on Fridays, so I was practically alone on my side of the flo...