Hacking Nature - my IVF blog

The IVF process is known to cause a big strain on the health, mind, and even finances, but generally people don't think of the documents one signs during this process and how taxing that can be to the mind as well. Today we sat with a folder full of such documents. Firstly, we had to decide if we want to know the gender of the embryos or want to transfer only the embryos of a certain sex. We decided not to find out the gender, a healthy embryo would be sufficient. Secondly, we had to read all the information about the process and basically learn how many ways it can go wrong. For every statistics I read, I was reading between the lines to see the failure rate. Like for a 70% chance of success, you actually have a 30% chance of failure and that is also quite significant. Once a person goes through a miscarriage, you learn to sense that the rates for failure is not just a number, it is you! The most miserable part was deciding what would happen to the embryos in the case of my ...

Today is Friday, but I am going to work tomorrow. As a software engineer, I really shouldn't complain about work because of the flexible hours and work from home benefits we get. But, like a spoilt employee, I still don't like the thought of working on a Saturday, poring over logs as they trickle down showing (hopefully) a successful transaction. I will get a day off because of it, but still tomorrow I need to work. I have a Nuvaring currently have inserted inside me that is supposed to give my ovaries a break from egg production before they are injected with hormones to create enough eggs to fill up a Costco sized egg carton. That Nuvaring, however, caused some side effects and had me spotting in the middle of my cycle. I have never used any kind of hormonal birth control before, and as my periods come like clockwork, I never saw any mid-cycle bleeding either. So, as you can guess, I was not very happy this evening. On days like this, positivity doesn't come easily. ...

To tell or not to tell, that is the question. Every couple is different, all our journeys are unique, and even within each couple, the people are unique individuals. When anything happens to me, it feels like entire Seattle and the major part of India already knows about it. Some parts of Europe does too. However, about the IVF thing, I was wondering should I tell people or not. Then I decided to go for it. True, it is because of the fact I told people, that I heard the random comments that I could have done without. But as I have the courage to face people and correct them, I feel good to tell people. There is a practical part too. At work, we sometimes need to take turns to work on the weekends, or take care of software releases. If I do not let them know why I cannot be part of the schedule it would be wrong. On the other hand if I do take part in that, it might just over stress me, or at times be just impossible. Like, I could possibly not be the on call engineer on the day o...

Some days are difficult. However much if an optimist you may be, it is difficult to stay happy, or rather, stay sane all the time. The earlier you accept it the better. The medicines are making me upset, just the fact that I have to take so many medicines is not a good feeling either. And the rest of the world doesn't care. However understanding your spouse/partner may be, they are not actually  going through  the process, so they won't get it either. The shots haven't started yet though. Work continues with all its follies, people around you are insensitive, because they know no better. Also, with all the medicines, you are slowly getting more sensitive to the people around you and what they are saying. Some people choose this time to talk in detail about their new babies, the baby troubles rather and explaining in depth their experiences with the birth process. I understand they are so happy that they want to share, but it may not occur to them that firstly, this is...